The Psychological Pitfalls of Tying Self-Worth and Happiness to Performance

Three takeaways:

As an unpredictable business world accelerates, organizational leaders and employees alike are increasingly relying on new technologies and advanced metrics to measure various aspects of performance.

The abundance of new metrics, from work productivity apps to wearable fitness monitors, has sparked a widespread obsession with performance. This has lead to a “performance-based identity” where we rank ourselves and others in entirely new ways.

For many, overprioritizing these metrics and forming a performance-based identity can be a harmful trap– one the leads longterm to burnout and unhappiness. Instead, we should prioritize the cultivation of a purpose-based identity.

  1. Identity and performance: reaching a performance goal offers only fleeting relief. As soon as we meet one performance goal, the next goal presents itself. This turns our self-esteem into a cycle of “if-then” statements that traps us in a relentless pursuit of validation.
  2. Mitigating the danger: When operating with a performance-based identity, we take steps to protect ourselves that harm our relationships with others, as well as ourselves. We apply performance metrics to loved ones and family members and coworkers. We become unable to emotionally cope with the unpredictable conditions of life that make it impossible to consistently meet self-imposed high standards. While we think we’re protecting ourselves by centering self-worth on performance, it tears at our wellbeing.
  3. Value purpose above approval: We must strive to be driven by purpose rather than performance. Purpose connects us to things bigger than ourselves, simultaneously clarifying our present and endowing the future with greater value.

Individuals and organizations that consistently win tend to be driven by something more than accolades or a stock price. When we are driven by an overall purpose, external validation becomes unimportant. We measure ourselves not against others, but against our overall impact in pursuing our long term goals.

When it comes to our own relationship with metrics and performance, we must, as they say, “check ourselves before we wreck ourselves.” Take notice if you feel yourself measuring yourself against those around you.

Remember hat Performance and Purpose are two very different fuels. The latter is sustainable. The former will lead to burn out.

By Kevin Lake and Michael Gervais, for Fast Company
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You Might Be a Late Bloomer

Seven Takeaways:

To its detriment, modern society is structured to promote early bloomers. But research shows that the talents that blossom in early life can often be more consequential. On Average, Nobel Prize winners make their landmark discoveries at the age of 44. Studies show that A tech founder who is 50 is twice as likely to start a successful company as one who is 30.

So why do some people hit their stride later than others? The article calls to traits of late bloomers that differentiate them from early bloomers.

  1. Intrinsic Motivation: Late bloomers may have difficulty caring about the external reward systems that often guide us in life– and are often embraced by early bloomers– such as grades, salary, and positive feedback from superiors. They are self-motivated, driven by their own curiosity, and their own obsessions.
  2. Early Screw-ups: Late bloomers often don’t fit into existing systems, which can lead to trouble within conventional systems in their younger years. Late bloomers often have a rebellious side to them, and a willingness to battle with authority.
  3. Diversive Curiosity: Late bloomers often report that early in life they enjoy a lot of different activities and fascinations. Using younger years as a sort of “sampling period” can lead to a breadth of knowledge that benefits them later in life.
  4. the Ability to Self-Teach: Late bloomers discover their calling later in life, once they’re finished with traditional education systems. They have to teach themselves, requiring and thus must embark on a path of self-education. This requires dedication and sustained curiosity.
  5. The Ability to Finally Commit: After a period of “wandering”– waiting to find the talent or niche or idea that best suits them– they pursue their chosen path with unwavering commitment and drive.
  6. Crankiness in old age: Having amassed achievements and endured challenges– and having had the time to refine their skills– they are fiercely protective of their time. They are direct in their efforts because they have spent so much time getting mistakes and learning out of the way.
  7. Wisdom: this is more than just accumulated knowledge; it is the ability to see things from multiple points of view, the ability to aggregate perspectives and rest in the tensions between them– then apply them to your work.

Overall, Brooks reminds us that whether one is an early or late bloomer, the common link is the drive to improve, flourish, and, well, bloom.

From David Brooks at The Atlantic:
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Note: At the time of this posting The Atlantic offers five free article views per month.


This site may contain links to articles or other information that may be contained on a third-party website. Advisory Services Network, LLC and MAP Strategic Wealth Advisors are not responsible for and do not control, adopt, or endorse any content contained on any third party website. The information and material contained in linked articles is of a general nature and is intended for educational purposes only. Links to articles do not constitute a recommendation or a solicitation or offer of the purchase or sale of securities.

5 Ways to Help Your Brain Learn Better

Five takeaways:

About a year ago, Sweden’s education system intentionally decreased its reliance on technology in the classroom– prioritizing paper/pencils over use of computers, for instance. The outcome has been positive, showing that less reliance on technology-based learning yields greater academic success & overall understanding of information. Neuroscientists have dug into why, and presented these five findings:

  1. Learning requires empathy: Learning is interpersonal. The understanding of new information is reliant a social connection we build with whomever is giving that information. This accounts for why 85% of tuition-free students and 50% fee-paying students never complete online programs.
  2. Creativity demands personally coded knowledge: Technology, including AI, effectively erases the need for humans to memorize large quantities of information. But it is often our practiced understanding of learned information that allows us to use it, build upon it, or employ it creatively. Technology gives us access to knowledge, but hinders our ability to retain it– or put it to creative use.
  3. Learning requires undivided attention: Given that technology is used for both academic and recreational purposes, humans become inclined to multitask between the two. Multitasking worsens performance as the functions necessary to perform multiple tasks often blend together. It also redirects our information of how to perform tasks to our subconscious memories, making them more inaccessible in the long term.
  4. Location plays a key role in memory: On a neurological level, printed information is easier to recall than digitized information because print ensures that the information stays in an unchanging location, whereas digitized information can change location and form across screens.
  5. Use Flashcards: committing facts to memory is the foundation for higher-level thinking. Flashcards are one of the most effective ways to get information to sink in, because they stimulate recall. Information written on flashcards help construct memory and become more easy to access in the long term.

From Jared Cooney Horvath, PhD for Psychology Today
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Note: At the time of this posting The Atlantic offers five free article views per month.


This site may contain links to articles or other information that may be contained on a third-party website. Advisory Services Network, LLC and MAP Strategic Wealth Advisors are not responsible for and do not control, adopt, or endorse any content contained on any third party website. The information and material contained in linked articles is of a general nature and is intended for educational purposes only. Links to articles do not constitute a recommendation or a solicitation or offer of the purchase or sale of securities.

Here’s Some Advice: You’re Asking the Wrong Person for Advice

Three takeaways:

During difficult times, it often feels natural to seek support from someone who has experienced the same issue you are facing. However, recent research indicates that individuals who have faced substantial challenges, even if those challenges differ from our own, may provide more effective support.

Social scientists say that those without intimate knowledge of your particular problem will not assume they have full knowledge of your situation, and be more likely to listen with empathy rather than stretch to apply their experience to yours.

Similarly, Close friends who are familiar with your past may feel more comfortable casting judgment or making broad statements when go to them for support. Going to people you might consider “weak ties” can lead the more insightful, sensitive conversation and a more open set of ears.

Here are three tactics for finding the right person to go to for support:

  1. Know what you need: do you need specific advice, or are you just looking to vent and feel heard? Once you know what you are looking for, be clear with the person you’re reaching out to about what type of support you need from them.
  2. Ask Multiple People: We seek second opinions from doctors all the time. Why don’t we apply this to our personal problems as well? Asking multiple people can provide a balanced and more comprehensive viewpoint.
  3. Find someone who’s had a different challenge: “Emotion match.” Seek support from someone who has faced a different but emotionally similar experience. For instance, if you are going through a divorce, someone who has endured a significant job loss may understand your pain and sense of loss, but also ask the basic questions that will allow you to feel heard.

By being intentional about your need for advice or support, and considering that your closest friends or family may not be the most productive people to seek it from, we can forge a better path towards overcoming the challenges we face.

From Elizabeth Bernstein at The Wall Street Journal:

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This site may contain links to articles or other information that may be contained on a third-party website. Advisory Services Network, LLC and MAP Strategic Wealth Advisors are not responsible for and do not control, adopt, or endorse any content contained on any third party website. The information and material contained in linked articles is of a general nature and is intended for educational purposes only. Links to articles do not constitute a recommendation or a solicitation or offer of the purchase or sale of securities.