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A Gentler, Better Way to Change Minds

Five takeaways:

  1. It can seem impossible to change another person’s beliefs. Brooks cites one scholar who notes that one’s personal attachment to beliefs encourages “competitive personal contests rather than collaborative searches for the truth” when it comes to ideological disagreements.
  2. Extensive survey-based research has shown that the two most widely shared convictions are: Harming others without cause is bad, and fairness is good. Beyond that, humans are excellent at finding things to disagree on.
  3. Research shows that if you insult someone in a disagreement, the odds are that they will harden their position against yours. This is called the boomerang effect.
  4. If we want any chance at persuasion, we must offer our opinions happily. Rather than as a weapon, as a gift– something we believe to be good for the recipient. This requires that we present it with love, not insults and hatred.
  5. Brooks offers three tips for greater conversational persuasion:
    • Do not “other” your conversation partner by scornfully dismissing their held beliefs.
    • Do not react negatively to rejection, because such rejection is their right.
    • Listen to your conversation partner more– stronger listening can lead to deeper understanding of their convictions, which they are likely to reciprocate.

From Arthur C. Brooks at The Atlantic:
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Note: At the time of this posting The Atlantic offers five free article views per month.

This site may contain links to articles or other information that may be contained on a third-party website. Advisory Services Network, LLC and MAP Strategic Wealth Advisors are not responsible for and do not control, adopt, or endorse any content contained on any third party website. The information and material contained in linked articles is of a general nature and is intended for educational purposes only. Links to articles do not constitute a recommendation or a solicitation or offer of the purchase or sale of securities.

How to Succeed at Failure

Three takeaways:

  1. This article provides practical advice on turning a major disappointment or failure into a life-defining opportunity for personal growth.
  2. A first step is realizing that “ruminating over a failure keeps it front and center and can lead to catastrophizing” – making it much more drastic in your mind than it is in reality. This can lead you to depression and anxiety, and then more failure.
  3. Brooks offers three handy tips for contextualizing failure in a productive way, based on conversations with Xiaodong D. Lin, a professor of cognitive studies at Columbia University’s Teachers College who has spent decades studying human failure.
    • Think About Other’s Past Failures (As Well as Your Own)– One must take the time to remember that even the most successful people have failed and slipped up countless times. At the same time, analytically breaking down your own failures can lead to a sense of control and understanding that alleviates frustration.
    • Stop Angling for Success– Chasing success above all else is a mistake. Remember that perfection is unattainable, and you will learn gradually to see the progress in each setback- and that the sting of failure is temporary.
    • Keep Your Ideals Front and Center– Nobel Prize winners do not set out to win the Nobel Prize. They set out to solve specific problems. To make new discoveries. A failure committed in the pursuit of a goal or purpose will more easily translate to productive learning.
    • People who pursue a greater sense of well being find meaning, learning, and purpose in their failures– using them to grow stronger and more effective.

From Arthur C. Brooks at The Atlantic:
Read the whole story.

Note: At the time of this posting The Atlantic offers five free article views per month.

This site may contain links to articles or other information that may be contained on a third-party website. Advisory Services Network, LLC and MAP Strategic Wealth Advisors are not responsible for and do not control, adopt, or endorse any content contained on any third party website. The information and material contained in linked articles is of a general nature and is intended for educational purposes only. Links to articles do not constitute a recommendation or a solicitation or offer of the purchase or sale of securities.

Hemingway, a Lost Suitcase, and the Recipe for Stupidity

Five takeaways:

  1. This article argues that the best intentions are no match for the havoc caused by stress, tiredness, and unusual circumstances– that poor decision making is often intimately related to one’s levels of stress or fear.
  2. Before legendary writer Ernest Hemingway had ever published anything, his wife lost a suitcase that contained ALL his latest work. The article uses this as a two-pronged example for its thesis about poor decision making.
  3. Hemingway’s wife, Elizabeth Hadley Richardson, was traveling and under duress when she lost the suitcase. She was out of her comfort zone and very thirsty– thus, she left the suitcase unattended, and it was taken. Her poor decision had been a result of personal difficulty.
  4. Hemingway’s response to the disappointment and stress of the lost suitcase, however, was to adapt. He had to make up for lost time and work, so he began writing in the short, essential style that eventually made him one of the most beloved writers of all time.
  5. The article argues that stupidity might be defined as “overlooking or dismissing crucial information,” and that we must understand the relationship between duress and poor decisions to recognize the stressful moments where we might be more prone to limited decision making.

From the Farnham Street Blog:
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This site may contain links to articles or other information that may be contained on a third-party website. Advisory Services Network, LLC and MAP Strategic Wealth Advisors are not responsible for and do not control, adopt, or endorse any content contained on any third party website. The information and material contained in linked articles is of a general nature and is intended for educational purposes only. Links to articles do not constitute a recommendation or a solicitation or offer of the purchase or sale of securities.

The Difference Between Hope and Optimism

Four takeaways:

  1. People tend to use hope and optimism as synonyms, but that isn’t accurate. A 2004 paper from The Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology determined that “hope focuses more directly on the personal attainment of specific goals, whereas optimism focuses more broadly on the expected quality of future outcomes in general.”
  2. In other words, Optimism is “the belief that things will turn out all right,” an assumption that Hope does not make. Hope is more powerful, “a conviction that one can act to make things better in some way.”
  3. Hope involves personal agency, and thus is more practical and linked to individual success. In 2013, researchers defining hope as “having the will and finding the way” found that high-hope employees are 28 percent more likely to be successful at work and 44 percent more likely to enjoy good health and well-being.
  4. Brooks lays out three steps to maximizing the practical value of your sense of hope:
    • Imagine a Better Future, and Detail What Makes It So
    • Envision Yourself Taking Action
    • Act!

From Arthur C. Brooks at The Atlantic:
Read the whole story.

Note: At the time of this posting The Atlantic offers five free article views per month.

This site may contain links to articles or other information that may be contained on a third-party website. Advisory Services Network, LLC and MAP Strategic Wealth Advisors are not responsible for and do not control, adopt, or endorse any content contained on any third party website. The information and material contained in linked articles is of a general nature and is intended for educational purposes only. Links to articles do not constitute a recommendation or a solicitation or offer of the purchase or sale of securities.
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