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Five takeaways:

1. This article explores the importance of learning as much as possible about our loved ones, particularly our family elders. Many of us live in the dark about so much of the lives of our elders.
2. Keating, a professor of sociology, has developed “the essential questions” that families can use to learn more about each other. The stories and memories these questions elicit, Keating argues, will “place you in a rich sensory world you knew little about,” and feel more connected to your personal roots.
3. Parents and grandparents have unique snapshots of memories of a world that will never return; absorbing those stories is a way of preserving lost worlds while creating lasting connection.
4. These memories reaffirm a family’s identity and can reaffirm one’s personal sense of history. A greater sense of one’s place in a progression of a family can add to a sense of personal meaning.
5. As we look ahead to Thanksgiving, take a moment to think about meaningful questions that will elicit thoughtful answers from your loved ones. You will find that your loved one’s answers may surprise, delight, and amaze.

From Elizabeth Keating at The Atlantic:
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Five takeaways:

1. While traditional religiosity and belief has been on a rapid decline in America, many overlook the fact that Americans are far more likely than people in other developed nations to practice religious or spiritual behavior
2. A 2017 Pew Research Center survey showed that 48 percent of respondents considered themselves both religious and spiritual, and another 27 percent said they are spiritual but not religious.
3. So why the rise of nonreligious spirituality? Spiritual experiences—traditionally religious or otherwise—give us unique insights into life that cannot be found anywhere else. They give us insight and connect us with “bigger” and more meaningful ideas about existence.
4. Spiritual practice has a real effect on the brain as well: Researchers have shown that a spiritual experience reduces activity in brain regions associated with sensory and emotional processing—thus, perhaps, helping people escape the virtual prison of overthinking and rumination. Studies have also shown that medical patients reported better quality of life if spiritual-care professionals (such as chaplains) were involved in their care along with doctors and nurses.
5. Brooks’ three tips for bringing more spirituality and transcendence into your life are to:
   • Start Simply – don’t go on a thirty-day Himalayan retreat right off of the bat. Do smaller, easier practices such as going on walks without your phone.
   • Read More – Start reading widely from the wisdom literatures and be careful not to start with the densest texts.
   • Let Go – Reject the urge to over-analyze. Strive to be more accepting of certain experiences at face value and accept your gut reactions rather than overanalyzing and overintellectualizing things. Acceptance, acceptance, acceptance.

From Arthur C. Brooks at The Atlantic:
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Five takeaways:

1. Points, games, adventure: the writer of this article turned to the “gamification” of parenting to incentivize good behavior from his children. Borrowing from fantasy books and video games, he would create quests and have his children compete for “experience points”—or XP— that could be redeemed for rewards.
2. Initially, it worked. The children’s behavior changed for the better. But quickly, the author and his wife began worrying that they were perpetuating– and bringing into the home– the near inescapable onslaught of quantification and competition that shape behaviors (grades, social media likes, performance reviews).
3. The worry is the replacement of sources of motivation. External motivators like XP are like the short-term, high-carb-candy-bar version of motivation. Eventually, there’s a crash– and motivation can wane.
4. Here we encounter self-determination theory that argues that motivation arises when individuals fulfill three basic needs: autonomy, competence, and relatedness. If these three needs are met, there is no need for an external reward.
5. Additionally, an overreliance on external rewards not only impedes kids from motivating themselves but also could make them feel like their parent’s love is conditional. The kids will begin conflating the reward with their parents’ love. It is better to create an environment where creativity and curiosity drive positive engagement in children.

From Josh Wilbur at The Atlantic:
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Note: At the time of this posting The Atlantic offers five free article views per month.

Six takeaways:

1. The tradition of Halloween originated with the ancient Celtic festival of Samhain, a Gaelic festival when people would light bonfires and wear costumes to ward off ghosts. This day marked the end of summer and the harvest and the beginning of the dark, cold winter, a time of year that was often associated with human death. Celts believed that on the night before the new year, the boundary between the worlds of the living and the dead became blurred.
2. Celts thought that the presence of the otherworldly spirits made it easier for the Druids, or Celtic priests, to make predictions about the future. For people entirely dependent on the volatile natural world, these prophecies were an important source of comfort during the long, dark winter.
3. The celebration of Halloween was extremely limited in colonial New England because of the rigid Protestant belief systems there. Halloween was much more common in Maryland and the southern colonies.
4. By the middle of the 19th century, annual autumn festivities were common, but Halloween was not yet celebrated everywhere in the country. When America experienced a wave of European immigration in the second half of the 19th century, new immigrants, especially the millions of Irish fleeing the Irish Potato Famine, helped to popularize the celebration of Halloween across the country.
5. Borrowing from European traditions, Americans dressed up in costumes and went house to house asking for food or money: the advent of “trick-or-treating.” There was a widespread belief among young women that on Halloween they could divine the name or appearance of their future husband by doing tricks with yarn, apple parings or mirrors.
6. Now, one quarter of all the candy sold annually in the U.S. is purchased for Halloween.

From History.com
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