The Psychological Pitfalls of Tying Self-Worth and Happiness to Performance
Three takeaways:
As an unpredictable business world accelerates, organizational leaders and employees alike are increasingly relying on new technologies and advanced metrics to measure various aspects of performance.
The abundance of new metrics, from work productivity apps to wearable fitness monitors, has sparked a widespread obsession with performance. This has lead to a “performance-based identity” where we rank ourselves and others in entirely new ways.
For many, overprioritizing these metrics and forming a performance-based identity can be a harmful trap– one the leads longterm to burnout and unhappiness. Instead, we should prioritize the cultivation of a purpose-based identity.
- Identity and performance: reaching a performance goal offers only fleeting relief. As soon as we meet one performance goal, the next goal presents itself. This turns our self-esteem into a cycle of “if-then” statements that traps us in a relentless pursuit of validation.
- Mitigating the danger: When operating with a performance-based identity, we take steps to protect ourselves that harm our relationships with others, as well as ourselves. We apply performance metrics to loved ones and family members and coworkers. We become unable to emotionally cope with the unpredictable conditions of life that make it impossible to consistently meet self-imposed high standards. While we think we’re protecting ourselves by centering self-worth on performance, it tears at our wellbeing.
- Value purpose above approval: We must strive to be driven by purpose rather than performance. Purpose connects us to things bigger than ourselves, simultaneously clarifying our present and endowing the future with greater value.
Individuals and organizations that consistently win tend to be driven by something more than accolades or a stock price. When we are driven by an overall purpose, external validation becomes unimportant. We measure ourselves not against others, but against our overall impact in pursuing our long term goals.
When it comes to our own relationship with metrics and performance, we must, as they say, “check ourselves before we wreck ourselves.” Take notice if you feel yourself measuring yourself against those around you.
Remember hat Performance and Purpose are two very different fuels. The latter is sustainable. The former will lead to burn out.
By Kevin Lake and Michael Gervais, for Fast Company
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